I'm a little bit worried. My Creative Writing tutor is going around saying that I stole his ideas for my book. This is absurd. After all, he's marked my work; I don't mark his, and I've never seen any of his unpublished work. What's more his published work is practically illiterate. And I wouldn't be seen dead in the trousers he wears. I'm going to drink a bottle of Château La Croix St-Michel 2001 Montagne Saint Emilion which I got £16 for a brace and think about this.